lately, i have been overwhelmed in my awe God. i can't seem to find words that feel big enough to describe this jaw-dropping state of amazement i am in. this morning, i was reading through psalm 139. i've been meditating on this chapter for quite a while (i have debbie alsdorf, amazing writer and speaker to thank for that.)

this morning specifically, i was reflecting on verse 16:

your eyes saw my unformed body.

all the days ordained for me

were written in your book

before one of them came to be.

Image: michele cat's flickr photo stream

um, amazing, no? before this body of mine even took it's first breath. before the girl/woman (yes. i can't decide which one i am yet and any discussion of it just turns into a bad britney spears song) i know so well came to be. before the skin, soul and heart by which i define myself was even made. God. ordained. every. day. wow.

any time i start thinking about that my mind feels like it might explode. that means that od knew i'd be writing this in this very moment. he knew that at 12:27 p.m. i'd be sitting at my computer typing this period -->. he also knew that this exact moment is when you'd be reading some girl named lindsey's attempt at a blog. and he knew that before you were born! what? that is crazy.

this one aspect of God is simply mindblowing, yet it's only ONE of many. there are so many more i could spend hours writing about. and i know that there are even more that i have yet to discover. this God of ours is pretty spectacular. how i spent so long ignoring him, i'm not sure, but now that i'm paying attention, life is beyond beautiful.

wow. Has it really been almost two weeks since my first post? my life is far more exciting than i realized! or, i'm just a huge procrastinator. if you take a gander at my last post, i'm sure you'll realize that the latter is true... but either way, isn't it beautiful to think that God knew that today was finally going to be the day that i stopped avoiding and started writing?

Let me tell you, my lack of blog posts has certainly not been for lack of inspiration. In fact, I would say that I've probably had too many thoughts floating around my head. hard to imagine/believe, i know.

So, I began to reflect on precisely why I was taking so long to post. I would keep starting and then I'd get another idea and start on that instead. I wanted my next post to be perfect and I had soooo many ideas that I couldn't seem to narrow it down to just one. I wanted to say everything, yet, ironically, I said nothing. 

Someone once told me, 
"Don't do nothing because you can't do everything." 

Think about that for a moment. I don't know about you, but that strikes a deep chord with me.

How many times have I said something like, "I want to start volunteering my time!". In my excitement and ambition I pour through website after website looking for that perfect volunteer opportunity. Inevitably, my heart is pulled in so many directions- between the homeless, abused women, foster children, children in Africa, children at my church, victims of human traficking, orphans in mexico and so many more, i get overwhelmed, and before you know it, I'm right where I started doing absolutley nothing. hmph. Frustrating to say the least.

In a culture where we have unlimited options for just about anything, from fast food to socks, it's a miracle that we make any decisions at all! So how do we? And how do we know that we are making the right decisions? One word: God. If it weren't for Him, I think my life would probably remain at a standstill of paralyzing indecision. 

Yes, we are overloaded with choices, but God has a plan that has already mapped out every single road, highway, shortcut and dead end we will travel upon. There are an infinite amount of possible routes we COULD take, but there is just one that we will. 

It would be impossible for any one of us to do everything, yet we get frustrated and feel defeated when we can't. We worry that if we support the children of Africa- who will take care of the homeless here in the U.S.? Or the battered women? Or.... {insert whatever it is your heart is drawn to here}. But here is the beautiful thing: God does not call you to do EVERYTHING. He calls you to a specific purpose.

Romans 12:4-6 says "Just as our bodies have many parts and each part has a special function, so it is with Christ's body. We are many parts of one body, we all belong to each other. In His grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well...." (NLT). Imagine if your ear decided to stop hearing simply because it was worried about not being able to see, smell or touch. Ridiculous. 

The beautiful thing is that we don't have to worry about everything everyone else is called to do, or even what we will do tomorrow because God has it all figured out. "And we know that God causes everything to work together for those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them." (Romans 8:28) God has all the puzzle pieces. He knows exactly where they go and exactly when they need to be put into place.

God has a purpose for you too; whether you choose to fufill that purpose is upon you. Perhaps today is your time to take action. You know that God has been showing you how to move, but you're at a standstill, unsure. Today, take the leap of obedience and faith and follow him. He is calling you to something specific for a reason. Even if you can't make sense of it, go for it. Trust me, God know what he's doing.

Or perhaps today, you have no relationship with God, and all you feel is this inexplicable void in your life, that just isn't satisfied no matter what you try to fill it with. God is calling you to him, I promise. Take that small step. God wants you as you are; beautiful, broken and dearly loved. He has a great purpose for you if you'll let him reveal it.

something you should know: i am a procrastinator. big time.

i'll be posting soon, i promise.

i am highly impressed with people who find time to post to their blogs everyday. 

apparently, i can't even get the once a week thing down :)

one day soon i will find a routine that works and you'll be wishing i would stop posting so often because you just can't seem to keep up with it all. *wishful thinking*

My very first post. So, you might be asking yourself, "Why is this girl writing a blog?" I, too, am asking myself the same question. Me and God have had several conversations regarding the blog, they go something like this:

God: I want you to start a blog

Me: Um, no thanks.

God: I wasn't kidding

Me: Seriously? What am I going to write about? Who in the world is going to read it? Why me?? I'm not even sure I know how to work a blog. More importantly, I'm not even sure that last sentence made sense.

God: Don't worry, I've got that all figured out.

So, here I am. I started a blog. And here you are reading it; I am truly amazed.

This morning before work, I sat at my desk in my room, drinking my much-needed cup of coffee and was contemplating my first blog post. Even though the blog was ready, I was still feeling nervous about posting. Why? because I (along with the rest of the world) do not like rejection. And posting something with the possibility of no one reading it, or worse, reading it and being uninterested, sets me up for potential rejection. No me gusta.

But, alas, God is good. And he encourages me. Yesterday, he led me to Exodus 3:11

"But Moses protested to God, “Who am I to appear before Pharaoh? Who am I to lead the people of Israel out of Egypt?”

Granted, God is not asking me to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, but he is asking me to do something I'm scared to do. Something that I feel like I'm not qualified to do. It would be easy for me to just ignore God's urgings- I mean, no one else would really know, right? But here's the problem: I keep telling God I want to do big things for him. If I want to do some big things, I better start with the small and listen to his voice, even when I can't understand why he's telling me to do certain things (i.e. start a blog). It's comforting to know that Moses, who was clearly an amazing, godly man even had some doubts in his capabilities.

That was yesterday. This morning, of course, God was still good.  I was questioning whether or not this was really of god. I mean, perhaps I had manifested this whole blog idea on my own and therefore was not required to go through with it. It's like I could hear God saying "yeah, nice try linds," when he lead me through past pages of my journal. I came to this:

"I need to start a blog. God keeps putting on my heart." 
(August 17th)

I'm very new to this whole blog thing, so we'll see how it goes. It'll be an adventure to stay the least. And even if it's not great, at least you can entertain yourself by making fun of me, right?!

I'll post as frequently as I feel led and will mostly be discussing what God is putting on my heart, whatever that may be. If you're interested, you can "follow me" (see the link to the right) so you can be notified when something is posted. and feel free to comment as well.

If you're reading this, it's not by accident. That part where God told me "I've got that all figured out"- he was referring to you.


****CORRECTION: so... apparently I AM really new the blogging thing and i was incorrect is saying that when you follow me that means you're notified of new posts. boo. BUT you should follow me anyway because it makes me happy :) AND i added a button at the top for ways you can subscribe to posts and comments, or you can just check back regularly.  yay!